


you and me together, nothing gets better

by earthandsky



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Canon Compliant, Drabbles, Established Relationship, F/M, Future Fic, Pre-Relationship, Unplanned Pregnancy
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-08-23
Updated: 2015-10-06
Packaged: 2018-04-16 18:50:14
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 6,294
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4636296
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/earthandsky/pseuds/earthandsky
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>a collection of jily drabbles.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. you're sitting in my seat.

James steals Lily's seat in potions class.

 

* * *

 

 

Lily Evans doesn’t spend much time talking to James Potter until midway through their third year. That morning, she had been stirred from a restful sleep to discover that her inkpot had been knocked off of her bedside table by Mary MacDonald’s owl, coating the quilt her mother made especially for her in dark blue ink. She’d cried about it for nearly thirty minutes until her other roommate, a normally gentle but, at this time of day, severely disgruntled girl named Julie, reminded her that she was, in fact, a witch, and could magic out the stain in just a few seconds.

Still, Lily had had a rough morning. She was hardly in a position to be patient, particularly with messy-haired boys who seemed determined to drive her up a wall. So, when James Potter dropped his barely-opened Potions textbook on the table in front of her, nearly making her jump out of her skin, she could hardly be blamed for shooting a glare in his direction.

“Can I _help_  you?” Lily asked, pushing the textbook back towards James, who was standing crouched over the table, looking unnervingly chipper for the time of day.

“Mornin’, Evans,” he replied cheerily, sliding the book back towards her. “You seem particularly pleasant today.”

“That must be my marvelous acting skills,” she deadpanned, shoving his textbook back towards him with a fair bit of aggression.

“Ah, yes.” He grinned, sliding the textbook back towards her. “A girl of varied talents, you are.”

Lily looked down at the book, then back up to James, a crease appearing in her brow. She sighed. “Look, I’m sure that whatever _this_ is –”

“‘Whatever this _is_?’” James asked incredulously. “Surely you’ve seen a Potions textbook before?”

“Yes!” Lily fumbled around in her bag for a moment, then pulls out her own copy, decidedly more worn than James’. “In fact, I’ve got my own, so _why_  do you keep shoving yours in front of me?”

“Because,” James said slowly, though still with an annoying degree of cheerfulness. “You’re sitting in my seat.”

Lily gaped at him for a moment, only to realize that he was being perfectly serious. “ _What_  are you talkingabout? I’ve sat here since the start of term.”

James grinned a bit wider at that. “Yes, I’m quite aware of that,” he replied, before reaching down to start pulling a quill and some spare parchment from his bag, and setting them on top of his textbook. “And since everyone knows that Lily Evans is ace at Potions – best in the class, according to old Sluggie – I figured I might as well try my chances in the lucky seat.”

Lily glanced warily down at the parchment, mulling over the possibility of just shoving all of his items off the desk completely. “Tell me, Potter,” she said, crossing her arms. “Did you fall off your broom in Quidditch practice yesterday evening? Or are you _always_  this annoying?”

“Oh, _definitely_ always annoying, Evans,” he said with a wink. Lily opened her mouth to respond, when Professor Slughorn entered the room in a hurry.

“Apologies, my apologies!” Slughorn said, a few vials falling out of his pockets. “I was taking a stroll in the forest and just came across the most _rare_  plant species I daresay I’ve ever seen. Do take your seats!” He puttered around the room, pulling a number of strange-coloured liquids from his robe pockets. His eye caught on James and Lily for a split second before addressing Lily, though he was looking pointedly at James, “Miss Evans, if you would be so kind to as to let Mr. Potter take his seat, we shall begin in just a moment.”

Lily’s incredulous gaze turned towards her professor, her jaw dropping slightly in indignation. “But _professor_  –”

“Now, if you’ll recall, we left off on page two-hundred and eighty...” Slughorn began, ignoring Lily’s protests. Lily glanced up at James, who at least had the decency to look slightly sheepish, before gathering up her books with a huff and moving towards a seat in the back, unfortunately next to a particularly pungent-smelling Hufflepuff boy.

About twenty minutes of fuming later, a balled-up piece of parchment appeared in front of her. Lily glanced over at Slughorn, and, after being thoroughly convinced that he was not looking her way, she unravelled it.

_Honestly, Evans. I know I’m dead handsome and all, but if you keep staring that way, you’re going to start rumours._

A scraggly ‘J’ was signed underneath the note and Lily looked over at James, who was leaning back on his chair with his hands tucked casually into his pockets. Lily scowled.

_Are the rumours that I’d very much like to hex you to next Sunday? Because those are true, I’m afraid._

Lily crumpled the parchment back up and tapped it with her wand, sending it zooming over towards James. The parchment hit him squarely in the back of his head, and he leaned back forward in his chair with a _thud_. 

Slughorn looked over, perturbed by the noise. “Are you quite alright, Mr. Potter?”

“Of course. Just enraptured by – er –” James looked over at the blackboard that Slughorn had been scribbling on, squinting a bit. “Gillyweed, sir.”

Lily stifled her laughter when Slughorn gave him a strange look in response, before he turned away and continued his lecture. Needless to say, the parchment reappeared in front of her a moment later.

_That’s a bit more aggressive than’s strictly necessary, don’t you think, Evans?_

Lily chewed on the tip of her quill, then wrote back. _You stole my seat._  She stared at the parchment, wishing that she could think of something more clever. After a moment, though, she realized that she had no _reason_  to need to be clever – it was only James Potter, after all – and reluctantly sent the note back in his direction.

A moment later, it appeared again. _Ah, well. Slughorn demanded it_. _Said that my squinting was distracting him, and we all know how delicate his sensibilities are. So, he told me to ask if I could take your seat, since it’s in the front row._

Lily raised an eyebrow at the parchment in front of her. _Well, I’m glad you asked me, then. It would have been_ much _worse if you’d just kicked me out of my seat with no explanation._

James didn’t write a reply, but merely looked over his shoulder and grinned at her before turning back around. Lily couldn’t help but smile just a little bit, which unnerved her, but she quickly decided to draw her attention back to the lecture, as Slughorn was gesticulating rather wildly, spraying some sort of liquid about.

At the end of class, James was waiting for her, so Lily packed up her books excruciatingly slowly, still a bit peeved and wanting to make him suffer just a bit. After a few moments, when the classroom had cleared out completely, James shuffled over towards her, with a small, almost guilty-looking smile.

“I asked Slughorn if I could trade with Vanessa Bradshaw, instead,” he offered. “She’s three seats down, and sleeps through most lecture days, anyway.”

“Alright,” Lily said, packing up slowly. She looked back over at him, glancing curiously at him. “Why were you squinting, anyway?”

James hunched his shoulders a bit, shoving his hands back into his pockets. “Well, see, Evans,” he started, smiling a bit wider, “that’s typically something one does when they can’t see.”

Lily raised an eyebrow. “Why don’t you get glasses, then?”

James mumbled something inaudible in response, to which Lily merely raised her eyebrows, looking at him expectantly. He sighed. “I _have_  glasses.”

Confused, Lily stared at his face for a moment, as though she was expecting something to magically appear in front of her. When nothing happened, she spoke slowly, as though she was talking to a very small child. “Er...James...you do realize that you aren’t wearing them, yeah?”

James rolled his eyes, crossing his arms a bit. “I _am_ aware of that, Evans.”

“Why?”

James glanced warily at her. “Because. It’s...” he trailed off with a sigh, looking down at his shoes. Lily paused, turning more fully towards him now.

“It’s...?” she prompted.

James huffed, looking back up at her, the tips of his ears and cheeks tinged red. “It makes me look stupid.”

Lily’s face softened, feeling a pang of sympathy, and took a step towards him, putting a hand on his shoulder. “Come on, James. I’m sure you don’t look stupid.”

James jumped a bit when Lily placed her hand gently on his shoulder, turning even redder. After a moment, he reached into his pocket and pulled out a slightly bent pair of black glasses, before shoving them ungracefully on his face. They sat on his nose a bit crooked, and were just slightly too large for his face, but something about them was _incredibly_  endearing – Lily couldn’t help but smile.

James’ face fell when he saw her smile, and moved his hand to take them off. “See? I told you –”

“No!” Lily reached out her hand to his to stop him from taking them off. The moment her fingers touched his, he glanced, startled, at her. She felt her face heat up slightly before hastily dropping her hand. “I – you don’t – that is,” she took a deep breath, and smiled genuinely at him. “They look nice.”

James paused, and glanced over at her, peering slightly over the rims of his glasses. “Really...?” he asked, cautiously.

Lily smiled. “Yeah. They’re – I really like them. They suit you.”

James grinned in response, so widely that for a moment, Lily was afraid his face might actually break in two. She smiled back, but James didn’t quite register that, as he was standing there, looking dazed. It wasn’t until he felt something bounce off of his head that he realized that Lily had taken the spare bit of parchment they had been passing notes on from his front robe pocket and had chucked it at him before running out of the classroom. Laughing, James chased after her.

The next day, James showed up to Potions class proudly sporting a slightly crooked pair of glasses, and an unwavering smile.


	2. we're not doing nothing.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> [tumblr prompt](http://valyriangold.tumblr.com/post/119727868492/hmmm-allright-then-for-jily-hmmmmm-well-if-we-can): marauders interrupting date night

 

 

* * *

 

 

Now, James Potter may not have kissed very _many_ girls in his eighteen years of life – it never really seemed like that much of a priority until somewhat recently, when there were always pranks to pull and mates to cause trouble with – but he liked to think that in the past couple of months, he had gotten rather decent at it.

That, or his girlfriend was lying superbly in a valiant attempt to make him feel better. But, that wasn’t a thought he entertained too often – after all, if he was really that hopeless in the realm of kissing, he’s fairly sure that Lily would have said something by now. Or, you know, stopped pulling him into dark corners to snog. Or, she’d have just outright chucked him by now.

(Yeah, he really hopes that he’s decent at it.)

So when Lily pulls away from him, her brow furrowed like she’s in deep thought – or, to be honest, deeply confused – his heart starts hammering in his chest because, oh Merlin – what if this is _it_?

(Well, okay, his heart was already hammering a bit from, well, _Lily_ , but those were obviously very different circumstances.)

[[MORE]]

“Er –” James’ voice comes out a little bit strained, and he flushes, pushing his askew glasses back into place. “Are – uh. Is everything – ?”

Lily moves out from under him, sitting up a little against the headboard of his four-poster, and pushes her tangled hair out of her face. He cuts himself off, and swallows hard, watching as Lily worries her bottom lip. 

“Is –?” she starts, and she doesn’t seem annoyed or upset, just confused, so he relaxes a little. Which is clearly a mistake, because he finds himself staring at her lips in a kind of trance, and when she coughs he realizes that she’s definitely just said something to him judging by the expectant look on her face, and he definitely has absolutely no idea what it is.

“Er…sorry?” He asks a little sheepishly, wrenching his eyes away from her lips. And, despite her look of concerned confusion from just a moment ago, there’s amusement shining in her bright green eyes.

“I asked if you heard something,” she clarifies, tugging absently on a lock of his hair.

“Heard – what?” he asks thickly, looking back down at her lips.

She flushes deeper, making him grin lopsidedly at her. “Right, then. Nevermind,” she says, pulling his lips back to hers so hard he’s pretty sure she knocks his glasses across the room.

And his mind goes pretty much blank, as it always does when kissing Lily Evans, and everything is brilliant again.

When she pulls away a second time, it takes him a moment to realize that he’s somehow now underneath her because as soon as her lips leave his, he’s gasping for air. It doesn’t help matters when she sits back suddenly onto his hips, her concerned expression returning to her face.

“ _Merlin_ , Lils,” James sputters, blushing deeply as he squirms out from under her.

“You had to have heard that,” Lily says in response, crossing her arms over her shirt, where a button or two have somehow become loose. James ruffles his hair, sitting up a bit, opening his mouth to say no, he didn’t hear anything, and they could get some earplugs if that would help because –

And then he hears it.

“ _Prongs_.”

It’s a faint sound, but very clearly there and very clearly Sirius. His eyes widen a bit and he looks towards Lily, who’s looking at him with a raised eyebrow.

With a sigh, James sits up more, pecking Lily apologetically on the lips before poking his head out from the curtains drawn around his four-poster. But, there was no one in sight, just as he’d thought originally. He’s about to poke his head back inside when he heard it again.

“ _Prongs_.”

And he looks down and realizes the sound is coming from his rucksack, and _oh_. The mirror. Quickly, he scrambles from the bed down to the floor and digs through the books until he pulls it out, seeing Sirius’ face looking back at him.

“What,” James whispers flatly, glancing up at the bed to make sure Lily’s silhouette was still there.

“Oh, good,” Sirius replies easily. “I’d started to think that Evans had eaten you alive or something.”

James immediately flushes a bright crimson, but Sirius, unaware of the entendre, continues breezily. “We’re at Zonko’s and I wasn’t sure how many dungbombs we had left.”

Sirius blinks up at him expectantly, but all James can do is stare for a moment in disbelief. “Are you – _dungbombs_ , Sirius?” James whispers back after a beat. “I’m on a bloody date!”

Sirius looks flatly at him. “It’s hardly a date if you’re just lying about doing nothing.”

“It’s – I mean,” James ruffles his hair, glancing back towards Lily. “We’re not doing _nothing_.”

Sirius pulls a face. “Ugh, don’t. Just – d’you know how many dungbombs we have, or not? Pete couldn’t remember and Remus is off getting firewhiskey for later.”

James sighs, dragging a hand down his face. “I think we’ve still got six.”

Sirius grins wickedly back at him. “Brilliant. Let’s make it a dozen.” And in a moment, his face was gone. James sighs again, shoving the mirror back into his rucksack, unable to stop himself from starting to think about what they could use those new dungbombs for…he can’t help but grin a little bit to himself, imagining Filch’s face amidst a smattering of dung-scented clouds, and pulled back the curtain to his bed.

Lily was laying against his pillow, her eyes fluttering closed, looking like she was half-asleep already. James’ grin shifts to a soft smile. They’d both been up late recently, with Heads duties and rounds getting more and more intense as the schoolyear wound down. Between that and N.E.W.T.s, not to mention that Lily’s mother had been ill recently, he wonders if she’d been getting any sleep at all.

James gently lays down next to her, wrapping an arm around her and moving his head next to hers, cuddling close. Lily’s eyes flutter open, and she looks over at him and sighs. “I _really_ wanted to snog you all afternoon,” she says through a yawn, sounding almost petulant.

“I know,” James laughs, snuggling close to her with a slow smile. He runs his fingers through her hair gently. “Go to sleep, love,” he says softly. “I’m not going anywhere.”

Lily smiles brilliantly at him, moving even closer to wrap her arms around his neck. “So romantic, Potter,” she teases, her breath tickling his neck.

James’ ears turn pink, but he laughs a little. “It’s just so I can snog you more later,” he teases back. “Obviously.” Lily pinches his side, laughing too, and after a moment, their laughter mellows and in just a few minutes, Lily’s slow breath against his neck tells James that she’s fallen asleep. James’ own breaths steady after a moment, and he feels himself drifting off, too. – after all, he’s barely slept lately, too, what with the end of the year coming up and Quidditch getting more and more intense by the day.

James is just about to doze off, when he hears it again.

“ _Oi, Prongs!_ ”

It’s much louder this time, and James flails around for a second, then immediately stills, glancing over at Lily. He breathes a sigh of relief when she’s still sleeping, and slowly works to gently extract himself from her limbs without waking her. By the time he manages to return to the floor and get the mirror, it’s been a few minutes, and Sirius has been calling his name impatiently.

“ _Christ_ , Padfoot,” James whispers into the mirror, scowling at the amusement on Sirius’ face. “Lily’s sleeping.”

Sirius barks out a laugh. “Wow. That boring, eh?”

James groans, placing his face in his free palm. “I swear, if this is about dungbombs again ¬–”

“Relax, mate,” Sirius waves him off. “Just wanted to make sure I didn’t bollocks your date up earlier.”

James stares at him. He loves Sirius – he’s like his brother – and he knows that they’d both do anything for each other. But that is definitely a level of considerate behavior that they both know Sirius is incapable of.

“Bullshit,” James says immediately, and Sirius grins.

“You’re right. Wormtail said he’d buy me Fizzing Whizbees if I interrupted your date again.”

“Right,” James says, shoving the mirror back into his rucksack. “I’m finding new mates. Tell Moony I’m sorry, but he’s stuck with you two.”

James hears the fading laughter of Sirius and Peter distantly as he crawls back into his bed, to find that Lily’s woken up and is peering at him sleepily, but amused.

“Fizzing Whizbees _are_ delicious,” Lily points out, and James groans, burying his face into her neck.

“ _Your_ mates never interrupt our dates,” James whines into her neck, and Lily can’t help but laugh.

“That’s because they prefer to make fun of us in public,” She says cheerily. James groans again, and she pokes him. “Chin up, love. In a few hours, you’ll have six shiny new dungbombs.” James huffs in response, so she clears her throat.

“And you can hide them all in Sirius’ bed.”

James lifts his head slowly to find Lily grinning at him. Slowly, he returns the grin. “Knew there was a reason I kept you around, Evans.”

Lily smiles wider. “You know,” she says thoughtfully. “You’ve got six here already…and they won’t be back for at least another half an hour.”

James grins back at her, then leans in to kiss her sloppily on the cheek before grabbing her hand and pulling her off the bed after him to race towards the secret Marauders stash in the loose floorboard outside the Astronomy Tower, Lily laughing as she runs beside him. And James thinks to himself as they round the corner, Lily’s eyes bright and shining and all traces of exhaustion replaced with pure joy, _yeah – if this is doing nothing, I could do nothing with her forever_.


	3. Together Can Never Be Close Enough For Me

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> an "If They Lived" AU written as part of [jilytober](http://jilytober.tumblr.com)!

Sunday mornings at the Potter house involved, more often than not, loud and peculiar noises, bare feet skidding down newly polished wooden floors, and a copious amount of Quidditch playing.

This particular morning, however, was a much quieter affair.

“ _Mum_ ,” Harry laughs, swatting away his mother’s well-meaning hand, hair comb and all, away from his face. “This is as good as it’s going to get.”

Lily sighs grandly, placing the comb back on the counter, watching her son tug at the sleeves of his freshly starched shirt. She holds back a small smile. “Well, I suppose you’ll have to do.”

Harry beams at her, and _goodness_ , if he wasn’t the spitting image of his father normally, he certainly was when he smiled – all playfulness and soft sincerity, pieces of unruly hair falling into his eyes. It nearly takes Lily’s breath away. Smiling, she reaches over to squeeze Harry’s shoulder.

“I can’t believe this is – it’s happening,” Harry says, his voice catching and making a little choked sound. Lily tightens her grip on his shoulder as he turns towards her – her baby boy – and asks, “Did you feel this way? With Dad, I mean? Like...everything is just suddenly...I dunno.” 

Lily frowns, and moves her hand from his shoulder down to his hand. “Are you having second thoughts?” She asks, gently.

Harry snaps his gaze up to her, startled. “What? No, I – ” He lets out a deep breath, and runs a hand through his hair. “I’ve never felt more sure of anything in my life, honestly.”

Lily grins, wide, her green eyes sparkling. “Then, yes,” she says, picking up the comb from the counter and handing it back to Harry. “It’s exactly how I felt.”

And it was, more or less, Lily thinks – though, now there is, of course the absence of that fear. The absence of death lurking, waiting to snatch up any of them at any moment. They were dark times, then. Darker than anything Lily could have imagined. The headlines, the disappearances, the hushed voices and suspicions. But with James, well… he was – _they_ were, together, – a shining light so strong it nearly knocked them both off their feet.

 _Yes_ , Lily thinks, brandishing the comb at her son. _It was the same. Only, different, of course._

Harry takes the comb, rolling his eyes a bit, with a fondness that pulls Lily out of her thoughts, making her heart swell. Grinning, she taps him on the shoulder. “You’ve got another quarter of an hour – why don’t you go floo Ron? I’m sure he’s going nutty without you.” 

Harry grins, giving Lily a grateful look, before he stands up and wraps his arms around her. Lily takes a moment to breathe, a familiar prick of tears behind her eyes. Her boy, her _Harry_...so grown, and so much like his father, so much like her, so much the best parts of both of them combined. And now he wasn’t going to be just her son, or just Mia’s and Holly’s brother, but  someone’s _husband_ , perhaps a father someday.

With the war – after the prophecy – Lily wasn’t sure that she’d ever see her son get married. She wasn’t sure she’d even get to take him to the zoo, or teach him to read, or walk him through the streets she’d loved as a child.

And now he was hugging her goodbye, on his wedding day.

Harry was still grinning, and Lily quickly wipes away her tears and gives him a grin in return. He kisses her cheek, promises to see her soon, and in a moment, he is gone.

Lily stands for a moment, still, quiet. She traces her fingers along the wooden bedframe in Harry’s childhood bedroom, littered with knicks and dings – scratched by the cat, stained with broom polish – and looks around at all the photographs on the wall: fourteen-year-old Harry and Ron and Hermione grinning up at the camera at the Quidditch World Cup, three-year-old Harry and James baking a cake to celebrate the arrival of Harry’s new baby sister, spelling M-I-A out in lopsided icing, seventeen-year-old Harry and his sisters on the platform of the Hogwarts Express – Holly’s first day of Hogwarts, and Harry’s last first day. Lily feels overcome by a sudden rush of emotion, one not completely identifiable, but so strong that she needs to sit down for a moment.

“Alright, Potter?”

James’ hair, Lily notes, is an identical mess to Harry’s, his glasses are falling off the bridge of his nose, his dress robes are rumpled and ridiculous-looking from staying too long in the closet, he is grinning lopsidedly at her and Lily is fairly certain that she has never loved James more than in this moment.

“Alright,” she replies, standing up slowly from the bed to walk over and lace her fingers with his. His fingers are long and his hands are warm and he is home. 

“Two more to go, eh?” James jokes, resting his chin on the top of her head.

“I want another,” Lily blurts out, and immediately blushes. She hadn’t meant to say that – she hadn’t even realized that she was thinking that, to be perfectly honest. Three children was plenty – she loved them with everything she had, of course, but they were happy as a family of five. Of eight, really, with Sirius and Remus and Peter. Nine if you counted the cat.

But James just laughs, kisses her head, and draws his arms around her waist. “Well, alright then. We can make that happen, I reckon. And there’s no time like the present, love, we’ve still got ten minutes before we have to leave – “

Lily pinches James in the side, hard enough that he yelps a bit through the laughter, and then he’s trying to pinch her back and she’s swatting his hands away, and they’re both laughing and tickling each other, and somehow, as these things always seem to end, James has her pushed up against the doorframe and is laughing into her mouth as he kisses her, deeply, unhurried, like they’re both seventeen and sitting under a tree by the Quidditch pitch, and nothing matters in the world except each other.

This time it’s James who breaks away, and he trails kisses up her neck, kisses her softly behind her ear, then her forehead, then pulls back to smile softly at her. “Why don’t we revisit this topic of conversation _after_ we watch our son get married.”

Lily smiles. “So practical,” she teases. “When did you become the responsible one?”

James grins back, and pecks her on the lips again. “You’ve corrupted me,” he sighs, just a dash of hyper-dramatics seeping into his tone. “I’ve got a secret stash of the kids’ schedules, color-coded in my desk at work, and a list of emergency services for any possible illness or injury they may acquire in the times during the day when neither of us are with them.”

“Ah, yes,” Lily laughs. “The dangers of primary school. It’s a wonder muggles survive past infancy.”

James looks at her, trying to seem affronted, but with a smile in his eyes. “Mocking me, eh, Potter?” He tuts at her, leaning closer. “Such poor manners, _honestly_ …” He’s leaning down to kiss her again, when the voice of their youngest daughter bellows through the house.

“ _Mu-uuum! Dad! Uncle Sirius is here, he says we gotta go!”_

 _This is it_ , Lily thinks, and she watches as James leans back, reaches for her hand and squeezes. 

“Our Harry, married…” He says, softly. He smiles and nudges Lily’s shoulder. “Three children, two in Hogwarts, one nearly married. We must be getting old.”

Lily grips his hand tighter, a calm feeling settling in her stomach, and she leads him down the hallway towards the staircase. And Lily’s last thought before walking down the stairs, hand in hand with her husband, is: _Yes, we are. And thank God for that._


	4. i love you, baby

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> prompt: "could you do a cute fic during the time period where Lily was pregnant with Harry?"

Lily knit when she was nervous. 

 

It was a habit she had picked up from her mother, she thought, thinking back to when her father lost his job the first time, or when Lily slammed the door in Severus’ face the summer after fifth year, or Petunia brought home Vernon for the first time and announced their engagement. Lily could always find her mother a quarter of an hour later, like clockwork, sitting in the same worn-out loveseat, yarn and needles spinning quickly between her hands until, just a few hours later, Lily had a new sweater, or a new blanket, or about fifty new tea cosies.

 

And it was the perfect solution to calming Lily’s nerves, really – it gave her something to do with her hands instead of letting them twitch about all over the place, it focused her attention, and it was productive. She could concentrate on making her stitches and loops perfect, rather than thinking about whatever it was that was making her nervous. It was an ideal solution, truly, and aside from the fact that it always made her a bit sad, thinking of her mother, it also made her feel closer to her mum in a way that she couldn’t quite place.

 

Today, however, was not going as planned. Lily’s yarn was spilling all over the place, her stitches were uneven, leaving holes and knots all throughout the scarf, and she was nearly on the verge of tears, plotting the slow and sweet destruction of the knitting needles that kept jabbing her hands every time she tried to shakily make a few stitches.

 

And that was how James found her that afternoon, with her hair frazzling out of its knot and into her face, various knitting needles of all different sizes strewn around her, a mangled, knotted ball of yarn, and her solemn expression fixed on the empty fireplace in front of her.

 

“Er…” James looked around, surveying the state of disarray. “Did the knitting needles do something to offend you, or am I interrupting some kind of ritual sacrifice to the crafting gods?” He quirked a smile at her, crossing to sit on the sofa across from her. 

 

Lily didn’t smile back.

 

“We...we should talk,” she said instead, worrying the yarn between her fingernails, chewing at her bottom lip. James’ smile dropped immediately, and he moved to sit next to her on the sofa, wincing when a knitting needle poked his backside, and muttering an expletive. He thought he saw a ghost of a smile appear on Lily’s face, but in an instant, it was gone.

 

“What’s wrong, love?” He asked, brushing a strand of hair from Lily’s face and tucking it gently back into place. Which was the wrong move, apparently, because she burst into tears – and not the quiet, trickling tears he sometimes caught when she read a very sad book or got an untoward letter from her sister, but loud, racking sobs that shoot her entire body, like when her mum died – like when _his_  parents died – and James’ heart dropped into the pit of his stomach because something was terribly, terribly wrong.

 

Immediately, James’ arms wrapped around her waist and shoulders, gently pulling her to his chest and stroking her hair as she sobs into his shoulder, tears staining his collar, hot and wet. He kissed her hairline, and held her as tightly as he could. His throat was to dry to speak, but he just whispered that it would be okay, even though he doesn’t know if it would, and that he loves her, which is perhaps the only thing in this constantly changing world they live in that he knew was, and would always be, true.

 

When Lily pulled back several long moments later, her face blotchy and red, James certainly was not expecting the first words out of her mouth to be, “Oh _James_ , we’re so bloody _stupid._ ”

 

“We’re – pardon?” He said thickly, wiping away a few tear with his thumb. Lily sighed, deeply, running the back of her hand over the red tip of her nose.

 

“You, and me, we’re _stupid_  and – god, why do we have to have so much _sex_  all the time, honestly!”

 

James’ eyes widened, his eyebrows jumping up to his hairline, and honestly, this conversation just kept taking more twists and turns than he was prepared for. “Er –”

 

“It’s like we’re _teenagers_  – _stupid_ , randy _teenagers_ ,” Lily made a frustrated noise, flailing her arms.

 

James couldn’t help but flush at that, and he immediately jumped to say, with perhaps a bit defensiveness, “Well, technically –”

 

“And you!” Lily pointed a finger, jabbing James in the chest. James immediately held his arms up in surrender, feeling particularly grateful that Lily’s wand didn’t seem to be anywhere nearby. “You’re bloody _awful_  at charms, didn’t Flitwick manage to teach you _anything_!”

 

“Oi!” James’ ears were steadily turning redder, because, true, charms wasn’t his strongest suit but he _really_  didn’t understand where all of this was going –

 

Until he did.

 

James’ throat went completely dry, and he swore, his heart couldn’t have beaten any faster if he tried. Lily was still yelling, her arms moving about rapidly, and she didn’t look like she was stopping anytime soon, but James couldn’t focus on what she was saying because – _Merlin._  Was it possible…?

 

“Lily,” James croaked, watching as she furiously continued to continue knitting the sad pile of discarded yarn. Her head jolted up towards him and she immediately snapped.

 

“ _What_?”

 

James swallowed. “Are – you’re…? I mean – are _we_ …going to...?” He couldn’t even say it. He could barely make his mouth move, let alone words, let _alone_  ask the question.

 

Lily seemed to deflate, all of the frustration seeping out of her body. The knitting needles and yarn slithered out of her hands, clattering onto the floor, and she let out a small huff, almost like a sad sort of laugh. She looked at him, her face still red and blotchy from the tears, and said in a very small voice – “I’m pregnant.”

 

James’ glasses fell off the bridge of his nose.

 

Quickly, he scrambled to pick them off the floor and shoved them back onto his face. He moved his whole body towards Lily, who was watching him, scrutinizingly, silent, and slowly reached for her hand. He squeezed it, then broke into a smile.

 

“You’re – I’m gonna be a dad?” He whispered, his smile growing wider as his voice cracked just a little bit. Lily looked down at their hands, then up to James, her eyes watering again and she nodded slowly. James’ grin grew, and he scooted forward on the couch to embrace her. “ _Lily_.”

 

Lily hugged him close, letting out a huff of disbelief, a smile building slowly. “With everything going on I... I wasn’t sure if you’d be...well…”

 

James pulled back immediately, gently holding her shoulders, and looked at her, flabbergasted. “Lily,” he said, firmly. “This is – I can’t even – I know, with the war and all, it’s – the timing isn’t...but,” he exhaled, a shaky smile taking over his features once more. “A _baby_ , Lils –we’re – going to be _parents_ , you and me. I can’t pretend that doesn’t make me feel like – well –” His whole face lit up, his grin getting wider. “Like I’m over the bloody moon about it.”

 

Lily stared at him for a moment, her face an unreadable confliction of emotions, before she broke into a grin, beaming, her eyes watering again but this time for an entirely different reason. “A baby,” she managed to choke out, disbelievingly. She looked up at James and slowly  matched his grin. “I still think we’re bloody _stupid._ ”

 

“Surely,” James said, easily, squeezing her hand. “Daft as a bag of bricks, we are.”

 

Lily grinned wider at him, then looked down at her stomach, pressing her hand flat against it. Her smile shifted into something softer, and when James’ hand covered her own, she looked back up at him.

 

“What will we do?” She asked, quietly, lacing his fingers in hers.

 

“Well,” James said, running his thumb over the back of her hand. “You should probably marry me – it’s only proper, after all.”

 

Lily raised an eyebrow. “Weren’t you that bloke I married half a year ago? Or was that Sirius.”

 

James grinned lopsidedly at her. “Ah, that’s right! Well spotted, love. Well, at least now we can say we went the route of propriety. Keep the scandal to a minimum.”

 

Lily rolled her eyes, but kept smiling. “Prat. I’m being serious here.” She nudged his shoulder with hers. “We’re in the middle of a war – a war that we’re _fighting_  in, mind you. Even if we weren’t, this world – _our_  world – it’s not safe. So much could go wrong…” Lily trailed off, glancing back down towards her stomach.

 

“We’ll keep him safe,” James said, quietly, scooting closer to her. Lily’s eyes glanced down to their entwined hands, then locked back onto his

 

“You can’t know that,” she said, sadly. “Neither of us can.” Lily’s brow furrowed, and she looked at him, pleadingly, raw emotion in her face. “What will we _do_ , James?”

 

James sat quietly for a moment, then wrapped an arm around her shoulders, his elbow leaning against the back of the couch. His other arm draped across her waist, and his head dropped to lean against hers.

 

“Everything we can,” James said, firmly. “We’ll love him. We’ll protect him. The way we do each other.”

 

Lily nuzzled her head against his, and she took a deep breath, then nodded, tucking into James’ side. _Love him_.

 


End file.
